Yes yes… I know it is the beginning of March and yet here I am posting about my “valentines”.  What can I say other than I have been super busy with some crazy travel to boot!  I couldn’t resist posting these photos of my sweet hearts though…. these are my boys Owen and Sammy

Sigh…it’s so great to be in love!

Shah Rukh Khan spoke candidly on Valentine’s Day and the changing times. And in his times, this king of romance didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day with different gifts but by doing things differently.

“In our days we never had all this, we used to take our loved ones out to eat chhola bhatura so I don’t know if I gifted anything but we used to write cards and, write all sugary poetry, we thought it was very creative. But now if I read the letters I don’t think it’s creative,” says Shahrukh Khan.

So during recession days what can Gauri expect from the Shah Rukh on Valentine’s Day?

“Material gifts don’t count. I wish her health and she wishes me health. Now of course everyone wishes me health,” says Shah Rukh.

And finally what does SRK really think of this Hallmark Holiday?

“Valentine day for me is more a day of love, of course which actors keep trying to do through their work. But on this special occasion I would like to tell everyone to think of someone you care of. Think of some old relationship that you have forgotten in this everyday life and work and feel it in your heart,” Shah Rukh.

The king of Bollywood seems all set to reign the romantic days as well.

That seems like a silly question I know, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about today. Today is Valentine’s Day. I am very fortunate to be married to my best friend. She is beautiful inside and out, a little bit salty and a little bit sweet. That girl makes me complete. And when she walks into a crowded room she still takes my breath away and when she kisses me I still get goosebumps. She is my Bride and I love her.

The Bible says that WE, you and I are the “Bride of Christ”. Throughout scripture there are references to God’s everlasting love for us. In fact the whole book of Song of Solomon is like a hot paperback love story that describes how God feels about you and me. (It really is kind of steamy and a pretty good read, except I think my wife would get ticked if I told her her nose was like a tower and her legs were like ceder trees. Doesn’t translate so well in our culture.)

But if we are the Bride of Christ, I wonder. Does God get goosebumps? When we walk into his presence does it take His breath away as much as it does ours? Does his heart skip a beat when we worship him and tell him how much he means to us. Does his skin bump up like a chicken’s when we whisper words o praise in his ear.
I don’t have any scripture to back it up, but I would say a resounding YES!
Go ahead. This Valentine weekend whisper sweet words of love to Him. He’ll get the adreniline rush that I am about to get right now. Time to go sit on the couch and cuddle with my love, Tammy.
Happy Valentine’s Day!

For Valentines day my Granny made meatloaf.

I got a kick out of it and felt like it was blog worthy.

Chocolate dipped strawberries & cream - photo by Leonard Low

Think the connection of chocolate to Valentine’s Day is just artificial commercial hype? You may be right. But why don’t we dance quickly through the history of chocolate, and see if we can find out why we link it to love.

The very word — mmmmmm, chocolate — comes from the Aztec word xocolatl, meaning “bitter water.” And the Aztecs associated chocolate with their goddess of fertility, Xochiquetzal. There — you see? Love and chocolate. The two go together. This is an excellent start.

And the stuff has been around forever. Well, about 3500 years, anyway. The cacao plant started being cultivated in what we now call Central America, sometime between 1100 and 1400 BCE, when the pulp of the chocolate fruit (rather than the bean, which is the big deal today) was used to make a fermented beverage.

Chocolate strawberries & champagne - photo by Leonard Low

There ya go. The first hint of combining chocolate and alcohol. Though perhaps we’d prefer wine today, rather than some mere “fermented beverage.” But let us dance on…

Walzing slowly and leisurely over the next 3000 years, we see that cacao beans became a valuable trade commodity, even used as a form of currency and tribute payment. In later uses, it was still made into a drink, but this time using the bean. And it was often drunk with chili flavouring.

Hm. Romantic or…not?

Enter the European explorers, and the tempo really picks up as we start a fast dance, heading toward the chocolate we know today. Christopher Columbus first took a few beans back to the court of Ferdinand and Isabella of Spain, the patrons for his voyages, but about 90 years later, cacao came to Europe in earnest (to Spain, primarily) to be used commercially.

And that’s when it started inching closer to a form we might begin to recognize as chocolate now. Europeans mostly abandoned the use of chili in the drink, replacing it with vanilla (another spice that had come from Central America), adding sugar and milk to counteract the bitterness.

The Chocolate Orgy Ended in Love - photo by Darwin Bell

Now we begin a sprightly court dance as, about a century later, Englishman Hans Sloane, President of the Royal Society and a founder of the British Museum, created the milk-and-chocolate recipe, which he later sold to the Cadbury brothers. And suddenly we encounter a name we really associate with chocolate. Almost there!

Our dance gets more lively, the chocolates we would recognize finally arriving with the Industrial Revolution, as machines would develop that could squeeze out cocoa butter. And while “squeezing out cocoa butter” doesn’t exactly sound romantic, it’s getting us closer and closer to that heart-shaped box of chocolates, because this was the process that gradually led to the ability to keep chocolate hard.

And now we’ve danced to the side of the room where modern-day chocolates hold court. But the question remains: is there a reason why chocolate and love are associated?

Chocolates

Well, some chocolate, especially dark chocolate, is said to be good for the heart, possibly even helping to prevent heart attacks. But that’s probably not the sort of heart we’re thinking of. Yet dark chocolate does contain some antioxidants and elements that help the circulation — can you feel your heart thumping and your blood stirring?

And it also contains a stimulant called theobromine, that helps to elevate the mood. In fact, the botanical name of the plant, Theobroma cacao, means “food of the gods.”

Which, of course, it is.

But aphrodisiac effects? Probably not. What we are feeling, we chocolate lovers, nay worshippers — what we feel when we eat chocolate is simply a sensual pleasure from the texture and the lovely taste. With perhaps a little help from those mood-lifting elements. But for the most part, we add the romantic elements ourselves, gathering happy, pleasurable things together into one experience. Which, in the end, is perfectly fine as we settle back into a slow dance, just enjoying the moment.

Though I still suspect we may be getting a distant little push from Xochiquetzal.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Chocolate Planet II - photo by fdecomite

(Many thanks to Maia C, who is no mean photographer of chocolate herself, for this Valentine’s Day idea! Sending a box of virtual chocolates to her.)

Nå nærmer det seg jo den store kjærlighetsdagen, og defor synes jeg det passet å blogge litt om den deilige multi balmen til Neom som nettopp heter “Tender Loving Care Organic Multibalm”. En liten perfekt gave til Valentinesday som bare koster kr. 155,-

Den ligger alltid i vesken min, og jeg vet at den ligger i mange av mine venninners vesker også siden alle fikk en av meg i julegave. En venninne fortalte meg at den hjalp på en tørr flekk hun hadde hatt i ansiktet lenge ,og som hun hadde prøvd å smøre med alt mulig annet uten effekt. Det som er så fint med denne balmen er at du ikke bare kan bruke den  som en lipgloss på leppene, men den kan brukes overalt hvor man er litt tørr og trenger litt pleie eller kjærlighet.

Grunnen til at den virker så bra er nok fordi den inneholder åtte økologiske pleiende oljer, appelsin og ingefær. Man kan sammenligne den litt med Elisabeth Arden Eight Hour Cream, men denne er selvfølgelig helt økologisk og uten kjemikalier eller parabener.

Alle trenger vi jo litt “Tender Loving Care”

Valentine’s Day is coming and you can’t forget your dog! You know your dog hasn’t forgotten you. So go give your dog a lovely valentine gift. Obviously, you can’t give your dog chocolate, but what about more attention than ever before.  Or just give him or her an extra doggie treat for being such a great friend and always being there for you.

Also, you can show your love for your dog to everyone around you by wearing tee shirts (and other things) with licks and kisses from your favorite pet! I know that my crazy Dragon dog loves to give me lots of loving licks. Also, you can give cards to and from your dog with the same image.

And for the more romantic of you out there, how about a lovely rose from your ever loving dog? To your loving valentine? Don’t you think a rose from a Pomeranian is so, so wonderful?  Or whichever is your favorite breed. As you know, Im partial to Kerry Blue terriers, but I can’t just show terriers here, can I?


As always, you can check out whether I have your dog breed in a valentine design on my site (see sidebar). I have a lot of breeds decorated with hearts and flowers, but not all. You know it takes time to get all 170 (or whatever the number of breeds the AKC recognizes now!) all decked out for Valentine’s Day. And I haven’t gotten there yet!

Tags: valentine’sday, love, licks and kisses, pomeranian, boston terrier, rose, hearts, doggie kisses,

Duftlys: Complete Bliss: Happiness kr. 395,-

Room-mist: Complete Bliss: Happiness kr. 210,-

Med marokkansk buskrose. En utrolig tilfredstillende behandling, fyller rommet med duften av ny- høstede roser.

Perfekt for å skjemme seg bort og forbedrer humøret.

 Badeolje: COMPLETE BLISS: Happiness kr. 425,-

Med marokkansk buskrose. Føler du deg litt deppa?

 De eteriske oljene i Complete Bliss vil løfte humøret ditt! Etterlater ikke badekaret fett.

1) She loves to stay connected and the T-Mobile Wing just doesn’t cut it

2) She would have constant access to her important files

3) It would fit snuggly into her purse

4) It would be a great fashion statement and look good on her

5) I would be her hero when I give it to her. And what man doesn’t want that?

Yes, Valentine’s Day is a greeting card holiday, and we should be celebrating connections with people we care about all year long. The odious onus of finding something to ’show we care’ slaps us in the head yet again way too soon after Christmas. 

At my library my theme each February, and actually a guiding principle of my life, is ‘Love is Sharing a Story.’ That neatly ropes in everyone, old and young, coupled and uncoupled, childless and, uh, childed.

I ask people to tell stories, write them down, read with their baby even if their baby is 50 years old, or read with someone else’s baby. Write a rap, or a poem, or just spew out your irritation about some issue Lewis Black or Dave Chappelle style. Learn to podcast.

If everyone spoke honestly and spoke up, if everyone read together, or if every adult, parent or no, took a few minutes each day to share a book with a friend or a small child, this would be a different world.  

But I digress.

I’m reminded by the newsletter from my mother’s Church of the Epiphany– “Don’t forget those who are hospitalized, ill or shut in on Valentine’s Day. Send someone a card, or make a phone call. You will brighten someone’s day.”

This is what I hate about Christmas.

That didn’t come out right. I love Christmas. But I have a strong family, work, and social network to share it with. I have tried on, so to speak, Christmas without family or husband or friends. I can’t seem to make it fit. It just feels miserable. I would feel sorry for myself, even if I were comfortable financially and physically, had my health, had good food to eat, and books to read and quilts to quilt… it was just too sad.

So rack your brain or look around for someone who can’t leave the house, or folks you know at the hospital. People with long term inability to get out and fend for themselves in the rat race eventually get passed over in the rat race. Even families with the best of intentions tend to pass over the quiet one– the wheel doesn’t squeak, so to speak.

And then there are the mean old (or young, I guess) biddies (male and female!) or the neighbors always yelling at us to ‘Get off my lawn!’ or even the kids nobody likes or the trio of siblings who, you happen to know, are being raised by a grandmother who can’t even do for herself because she is very ill, won’t even come in and get the kids a library card, sends the kids out to do their own laundry at the laundromat, so they are pretty much on their own (though I know from experience that being on one’s own isn’t the worst thing that can happen, some serious self sufficiency, at least  in terms of life skills, can result, you do what you want, and at least nobody’s yelling at you).  Or the acquaintance who’s divorced or the single parent or the friend who’s ill or having marital troubles. What might brighten their days?

Put some candy in your candy dish. Stop by somebody’s house just for five minutes with a flower or a warm lunch or a pair of fuzzy slippers you found on clearance. Drop a card in the mail. What small good could we do in just a few minutes? Brightening someone’s day literally makes the world a better place and it just takes a second.

“If he really wanted to be with you, he’d be with you” — Phil

This was pretty much the only thing my brother had to say about the struggles I was having in my last serious relationship.  The guy lived a thousand miles away, and had only come to visit me a single time.  I had visited him a couple of times and we had made plans for him to come and visit me again on Valentine’s Day last year.  Things were getting very serious between us.  At least I thought they were.

It didn’t take long after my getting back home after my last visit for him to back away from his plan to come on Valentine’s Day.  He was going to come some other time in February, after all “It doesn’t need to actually be ON Valentine’s Day”.  And shortly after determining that a Valentine’s Day visit wasn’t in fact necessary, he backed off from the visit entirely.  At the same time professing his love!  I didn’t get it.  I believed he wanted to be with me, but his actions certainly didn’t back that up.  I kept making excuses for him.  I soooo wanted to believe he wanted to be with me, but that there was something about him and his unknown struggle that seemed to make it difficult for him.  So I excused his behavior and lamented what seemed to be an insurmountable chasm between us.  And, my brother quietly and matter-of-factly said “if he wanted to be with you, he’d be with you”.  When the guy decided to bail from the relationship pretty much without any warning, and with a set of very odd explanations as to why, and after having done this to me already a number of times in the past, I finally decided I’d had enough and said, fine, you want to walk away, walk away.  To myself I finally admitted that I was tired of the games he seemed to be playing with me and that I couldn’t take his inconsistency and the incongruities of his words and his actions any more. 

As the days turned into weeks and months, I kept making excuses for him.  And Phil’s words kept coming back to me….If he had wanted to have been with me, he would have been with me.  If he loved me enough and there truly WAS some unknown struggle that was keeping him from me, he would have addressed that issue…

Then “Colin and Stephanie” and “Clare and John” happened, and I realized that not only were Phil’s words true, but that I NEEDED to have a guy show his intent by pursuing me…by wanting to be with me.

At sixteen, seventeen, and eighteen years old, these four teenagers have shown me that love does what it takes.  Colin, who lives in Northern California, has worked and saved and has traveled to Colorado to visit Stephanie three times since November!  Clare’s John also lives in Northern California.  Both John and Colin have flown in this weekend to take Stephanie and Clare to their prom.  What fun!  And what message does their coming here send to these girls?  That they are valued.  That the boys recognize the importance of things like the prom and that if the girls think its important, so do they.  It tells these girls that they want to be with them.  That they want to spend time with them.  And that they will do what it takes to make that happen, even though they have no idea what the future holds for them.

Don’t they look amazing??  Thanks for the love lesson, kiddos.  I needed that.  Have a GREAT time at the prom! 

…

Tittelen har ikke sånn veldig mye med innlegget mitt å gjøre sånn egentlig. men jeg sitter å hører på Beth Hart sin sang som heter “Good as it gets”, fra hennes nyeste album, 37 days. FANTASTISKE DAMEN! Og det er forresten ringetonen min også kom jeg nettopp på.

I går var det valentinesday, og pappa sin bursdag. Siden sistnevnte er altfor langt unna, ble det feira med en telefonsamtale fra min side. Jeg stod faktisk opp før elleve, drakk en kopp te og dro til Sverige for å kjøpe gave til C. Siden vi hadde bestemt at vi skulle ha vår egen valentinesday. Slik er det når vi to er single og maioriteten av vennene våre faktisk har fast følge som disse eldre så fint kaller det. Gaven ble kjøpt, pakket inn i den største hjerteesken jeg fant, og jeg dro på jobb. Jobben gikk faktisk ganske fort, og jeg tok bena fatt hjem til C, med en rask stopp innom nattsafen. Siden R. også var der, hadde jeg kjøpt med slike gode fylte påskeegg og et par flaxlodd. Jeg var i godhumør kan du si

Siden C. sier hun ikke er den flinkeste kokken, ble jeg overrasket over at hun lagde laks, saus
og poteter til middag. Noe som forøvrig smakte himmelsk. Og Dreamis til dessert gjorde ikke
måltid værre ;) NAM! *applaus for C*

Vi satte på en film ”Death over the supermodels” eller noe i den duren. Det skulle være en
komedie, og det var noe av det dårligste jeg har sett i hele mitt liv. Det er ikke ofte jeg skrur
av en film, men det gjorde vi.

Siden vi egentlig var trøtte begge to, åpnet vi gavene våre og la oss. Jeg fikk søteste gaven.
* Rød rose
* Pute med teksten ”You‘ll always be my best friend - You know to much!“
* Pakke med gelebjørner med teksten “Gode venner gjør hverdagen enda bedre”
* Boken “Den lille boken om kjærlighet”

Er det rart jeg er glad i ho sier jeg? Nei. Enkelt.  <3

Og det er masse som skjer fremover
Woho!

* Jobber i morra og søndag
* Ikea på mandag (mulig jeg blir igjen, ikke sikkert enda)
* Fest til helgen igjen
* Karneval 29. februar
* Beth Hart konsert 12. mars.

og innimellom alt dette tenkte jeg å komme meg hjem en tur på et eller annet mirakuløst vis.

Fantastisk
Og så synes jeg dette er litt morsomt *egotrippe bloggen*

As I write this it is Valentines Day, restaurants are full, hearts are everywhere, and couples are kissing and holding hands. On twitter a cool graphical hearts feature has been getting a lot of use (at least amongst my friends). Friends who are parents report that their children are excited about giving cards to all of their friends.

But this post is not just about Valentines Day and how I am single today as I have been for by far the majority of past Valentines Days (I’ve only had a date on Valentines Day 4 times in my life – and I’m 33 so do the math, fairly pathetic).

No, this post is about how and where to find inspiration when you are single and an entrepreneur. Something I have been thinking a great deal about (and struggling with) for the past few months.

I do not like being single. I know there are some people who do, some people who enjoy the “freedom” or for whom being “single” means lots of dating, lots of somewhat meaningless relationships.

But that is not me. And though I respect my poly friends, I am probably not poly (heck just being in one relationship is such a rare occurrence in my life the concept of having multiple relationships at the same time is well nigh unthinkable).

The world, however, is structurally set up for people to be in relationships – to be couples, not to be single, especially not as middle aged adults (I’m not actually comfortable calling myself that but at 33 going on 34 I’m no longer “young”). Prizes every where are for tickets for 2, homes and lifestyles and deals and expectations everywhere are that past some period of early adulthood most people will settle down into couples (and then in most cases into families).

I overheard a group of people at a restaurant a few weeks ago talking about dating, with one of the guys at the table talking about how hard it has been for him to have gone 30 days without sex. Don’t get me started on that (let’s just leave it at I broke up with my last girlfriend in the spring of 2006 – I’d be thrilled if it was “just” 30 days..) . But from the conversations at this table (mostly guys but one woman) the expectations there were that they all would and could date and date frequently and that “dating” led to sex on a regular and frequent basis – whether with the same person or multiple partners.

What does all of this rather personal stuff have to do with business?

Or with being an entrepreneur?

Well there is a key question for everyone to answer – what (and who) are you working for?

What do you want from your career? Why do you want (and need) money? Fame? “Success”? In short what is success for you? And how does that drive you? More crucially how will you know when you get there?

And then, if answering all that your path is to be an entrepreneur, how (and can) you get there?

If you are not single you have some fairly simple answers to the above questions – many people would answer that they work to provide for their partner & for their children (or future children). As they work, a partner is someone whom you can lean upon, someone who comforts you when you are down, someone who helps balance out your life – and on a very simple and practical aspect, someone who can take some of the load of life off you when necessary.

Now I don’t just mean couples who have a traditional (though not so much these days) life of one partner working, one “keeping the home/raising the children” even with both partners working one can usually take some of the chores of life from the other – cleaning the dishes, arranging for dinner, picking up the dry cleaning, paying the family’s bills, waiting for a delivery, etc.

But if you are single what do you work for? Who (or what) can you rely upon for support?

Where, in short (okay in long form), can the single entrepreneur draw inspiration?

I’ve been asking this of myself for the past few months. The life of an entrepreneur can be mentally challenging, you rarely if ever can be “off” – I only slightly jokingly describe it as “you always have something to do when awake, and when you are sleeping you dream about it” but that’s not all that far from the truth. Yet, besides “work” you also have a life – all the small, little things of living which collectively add up, which all take time and to a degree attention.

Here in Silicon Valley many entrepreneurs (and others) are fans of “Getting Things Done”. A part of that system is to create contexts, to think both about your very long term goals and your tasks for the next hour. And yes, from a tactical standpoint GTD can be very helpful and from the perspective of a process, of a way to think through what you are working on, what your goals and requirements are it is very helpful.

But from a deeper, personal level it only helps with the tactics, you still need to find what your personal source of inspiration is, to have an answer for yourself what you are working for, and to find some alternative (or alternatives) to the help that someone in a relationship gets from having a partner (or as I noted, partners).

For me I have historically had great friends and a great relationship with my family, both my friends and my family have offered me an emotional outlet – someone to talk to about what my goals are, to vent my frustrations, to relax with when that’s what I need. But two years ago I moved from my long time hometown of Chicago to San Francisco. At the time I was in a relationship (she followed me a month later) but a few months later she and I broke up and she moved again (to Mexico). We’re still friends, but now I’m in a new city, far from my immediate family, and though I have many friends here I don’t have the same type of friends as I had back in Chicago (i.e. friends whom I had helped move, whom I had known for years, had helped through crises and in turn had gotten help from).

So for the past year or so I have been seeking answers – been looking to myself for why I am an entrepreneur, what I am looking to do both in the short term and in the longer term. In part I also have been looking at myself. I still hope not to end this year single – I do think being a relationship is a better state for me than being single – but I also have to find answers that work for me if I’m still single.

This is a post without easy, simple answers but here are a few which at times help me, not to say I always keep my own advice, so in large part this is also to be a reminder for me as to what I should be doing, what I can change over the next few months which might, just might, help.

1. The life of an entrepreneur can highly varied, build into your week some regularity. Lately every Wednesday morning I have been having breakfast at 9am at Chow on Market St. (and inviting anyone to join me).
2. Don’t let your personal space go neglected – if this means dropping off your laundry and paying someone to do it vs. doing it yourself do that. A cleaner could be a great investment – but even just always (and see point 1 schedule this) spending an hour or less cleaning and imposing order on your living space helps considerably.
3. Don’t let you go neglected. Get exercise, eat healthy, schedule regular doctor and dentist appointments (all of which can be very hard when being an entrepreneur, especially the last two before your new company has group medical plans, one of the early things you should do for yourself and your first few hires).
4. Even if you can work entirely from home, don’t. Sure, work from home some of the time, but even more so as someone single, getting out of the house and having face-to-face human interactions is really, really important. It is all to easy to order in, to keep really odd hours, and blink and realize a week has passed and you have barely seen another human in person. This is not healthy.
5. Every few months do a brutal clearing out of junk from your life. Donate all the free t-shirts & schwag you have collected (so you aren’t tempted to just get by wearing poorly fitting free logoed t-shirts). Clear out of your kitchen expired foods – but also unhealthy temptations. Recycle pile of newspapers and magazines. Online this means hitting a reset on your RSS feeds, it also means unsubscribing from mailing lists you haven’t read in months and stopping emails from vendors & analysts you never read or reference. In 2006 I moved so many times this happened naturally, in 2007 far too much clutter & junk accumulated in my life both online and in my home.
6. Find a small set of peers and find a way to gather, in person, and talk openly and deeply with them on a regular basis. This can (and should) be hard, but seek this last point out. By peers I really do mean that, find people who are or have been doing something similar to what you are doing – other founders (perhaps though in other industries) and find a way to gather in a small group on a regular basis and talk. This might be over a dinner or even a card game – and the point here is NOT to do business together (if anything that might hurt the goal) rather the goal is to have a group of people who can tell you that you are being stupid, who can give you tough truths. Someone in a relationship hopefully has that type of honest from a partner – but especially as a single entrepreneur it can be very hard to be told the harsh but helpful truths. And it can be hard to find a way to speak out loud about ideas you are considering. I haven’t yet found this precisely, but periodically over the past year I have, at times, had some really amazing conversations in small groups which scratched the surface of this issue – conversations with friends who told me tough truths – who challenged and even yes confronted me. This can, should, be hard. But I’m serious, seek this last bit out.
7. Don’t go overboard but build into your week some  personal pleasures. No, I don’t mean reading even more blogs on your industry – no matter how passionate you are about it. What I mean here is you should keep up with some of the things which are why you live – are what you take a great deal of pleasure and enjoyment from. For me this is great food and good writing (especially science fiction). To a lesser extent it is also staying current on US politics and a bit of everything else by reading the New Yorker every week. On Saturdays I try to get to the local Farmer’s Market (both so I have healthy snacks and food to start the week and for at least one great meal that week). And even on weeks when I can’t finish a book I try to listen to two of my favorite podcasts – one a one hour discussion of music (Sound Opinions) and the other a weekly podcast of great short science fiction & occasional fantasy stories (Escape Pod).

However even sticking to all of the above won’t help if you don’t find an answer for yourself as to why you are an entrepreneur – i.e. what you are trying to do. This is tough – but seek out an honest answer for yourself and set those goals. At some point in time being very aware of your own goals and reasons will help you make a tough decision – when to stop, what to sell for, when you have “won” etc.

If you are in a relationship I think you should be honest with your partner and discuss your goal for your venture – but being single it can be harder to share your goal(s). Share it publicly and you might divulge something which could hurt you in the future (i.e. when someone is potentially investing in your company or considering buying it). But even without sharing all the details and specifics at least as an exercise for yourself write these goals down – even if only on paper and in the privacy of your own home.

Revisit these goals on a regular (at least once a year but I’d suggest more like once a month) basis and see how you are making progress towards them.

Keep in mind why you are doing what you are doing and, in fact, you have a greater shot at achieving it.

For me, again without naming numbers, here are after much thought what I want – why I’m trying to start something big.

1. I want a lot of freedom and flexibility – for me this does take some real resources. I want to be able to say no to a lot of people – I want to make my own choices.
2. In many respects where I want to live are not cheap places – nor, in fact, is it a singular place – I want to live and put down roots in more than one city (indeed perhaps in more than one country).
3. Eventually I do want to be a father – I feel I could be a good one – and thus at some point I want to be able to give my children the opportunity to pursue (and excel at) their dreams.
4. I want to build many things which will outlast me – and in doing so I want to help a great deal of others (individuals and companies).
5. I want to see my ideas tested – that is I have (and I suspect always will) have many ideas, I’m an entrepreneur in part because I want to take those ideas and see them turn into reality into actual products and services which help others and impact the world. I then want to keep repeating this – and to help many others do the same (take great ideas and make them real). At some point I suspect this means I’ll be either an angel or VC investor myself – but to get there I probably have to see a few of my ideas through to success first.
6. And I want to teach. I’m not sure where, but my fantasy of “retirement” has always been to get a PhD (or not to need one) and to teach – but to do so on my own terms and without needing to play political games (“publish or perish” etc). I think I can be a great teacher – but I also want to do more than just teach – I also want to do.

What are your inspirations?