Mine are the two thin bands, that will sit either side of my engagement ring.  Adam’s has “Love Forever” written in Latin around the band, it’s so awesome!!

If you’re after a fabulous jeweller – go to Andrew Walsh at Robert Parker & Sons (03 9650 3371) – you so will not regret it.  He’s amazing, custom makes everything and is so great with advice and tailoring to your own needs.

But things have been trucking along in the wedding department.  27 days to go and soooo many more things crossed off the list of things to do.  There have been some strange circumstances, some confrontations with the MIL (Mother-In-Law) and some moments that I just start crying because I get so emotional just thinking about the day.  But I have a bridesmaid who is like the Super-Batwoman-Bridesmaid that has completely changed my outlook on what this day will be like, and has added a whole new dimension to the planning and anticipation of the day.  She’s awesome.

We now have suits for the groom, best man and page boy.  They’re going to look HOT!  I didn’t get a shot of Adam at his suit fitting, so this is a model from the website…. and my son was very elusive when I tried to get the camera on him while he was at his yesterday… but you get the idea!

With thanks to Formal Red for the Groom and Best Man suit hire, and go to Trevor West in South Yarra for ultra cheap kids suit hire – $85, bargain!

My dress is coming together!!  It’s like watching a piece of art unfold.  I am so thrilled with it and it’s everything I imagined it would be.  We picked up our rings yesterday and they are also just perfect.  Adam’s had a latin saying for “Love Forever” inscribed on the outer of his ring – like in roman numeral style block letters – it looks awesome, so different and unique.

Our RSVPs are all in and despite all of the headache we originally had with numbers, we ended up with a few people that couldn’t make it so we were able to squeeze in everyone that was a number one priority to attend.  In fact, in recent weeks, it’s felt very much like so many things that seemed awkward or inconvenient to do with our wedding in recent weeks has been replaced by this feeling of “everything falling into place” and all things being as they should be.

We’ve got so many little surprises built into the day for our guests.  So I can’t go into too many more of them now… but I will be sure to write up all of them after the event so that any of you planning a Melbourne wedding can take my supplier list and use it as your own!!

I’ve previously mentioned that I have always thought I would elope.  There are many reasons why that option was appealing to me, but I think I am increasingly coming to realise that there is another reason that I never considered… disappointments.  As soon as I agreed to have the white wedding (of sorts), I was instantly filled with certain expectations.  I haven’t always wanted to elope and I guess part of me goes back to the childhood dreamy fantasies of weddings and the months that lead up to the Big Day.  That little girl in me is probably where the expectations come from – that notion that all little girls have of the fairytale.

Anyway, the expectations mean that I am suffering some pretty significant disappointments.  For the most part, I am disappointed that I am largely on this journey of preparations and anticipation alone.  Adam and I agreed to have a small wedding party because we wanted ‘casual’ and to contain costs… but that also comes with it’s own set of problems in that there are simply less hands offering to assist…. and less people ’obligated’ by their duty as part of the bridal party to be there to share the experience with you.  Obligated is the wrong word, because it should never feel like an obligation… but you get the point.

I think in my head, the sending of invitations is a pretty big milestone.  All the history, learnings, preparations that lead up to this moment, and the sort of commitment it feels to put it all down on an invitation and post it to all your nearest and dearest… it starts to make it real.  It’s actually happening.  In a little over 2 months, I’ll be married.  A wife.  Standing before everyone I know and declaring my love.  It’s a big deal to me and I think in my fairytale, I got to share the stuffing of envelopes with someone.  My bridesmaid, a close friend, my mum, someone that I could giggle with and get excited about what this milestone means.

The curious part of it is, I am starting to really doubt myself.  I can’t explain it here, but I am having some really negative thoughts about the value I offer in people’s lives.  I’ve been told some things recently that left me a little perplexed… because I really think that I try to put myself out there for my friends and family, offer support when needed (emotional, physical or financial), and it seems that perhaps I have a distorted view on how much that should be valued, or remembered, or reciprocated.

So in short, I am sorry if I bore you all half to death with my constant wedding updates on my blog.  I guess it’s my way of sharing it with someone else – even if that is the nameless, faceless interweb.

The perfectionist in me is being beaten down right now, because there are things about the invitation I would ideally like to change.  But with no time and no favours left, I just have to deal.

For those planning to make their own invitations, but want a professional printer involved in some way, I would recommend avoiding the traditional ‘Paper Places’ who will charge you $3-8 per invitation depending on how much of the assembly/cutting you want them to do…. and try !mpact Digital.  Fabulous Heath at Impact Digital is printing our invites, with personalised names on each, on 250gsm curious metallics ice gold stock, doublesided – for $2.25 each.

Couple that with my bargain (cheaper than everywhere else) curious metallics ice gold envelopes from Papermarc and 55c postage for each and our invitations will cost less than $3.50 each from beginning to end.  Awesome.

The other massive mission that is complete is the wedding registry.  We’ve both collected over 30+ years worth of stuff so we thought having our honeymoon as our registry would be a great idea.  I also thought it would be easy, but I was mistaken! 

We’ve now planned our entire three week itinerary and created a number of luxury, adventure, gourmet and cultural experiences that our guests can elect to buy us as presents.  From dinner at La Tour d’Argent in Paris, staying in the W Hotel in Hong Kong, indulging in the owner’s private pied-a-terre at Casa Howard in Florence, magnificent scenic train travel, car hire so we can explore the South of France, Amalfi Coast and Tuscany at our leisure, museum passes in Rome and Paris, tickets for the Eiffel Tower, to our final nights in Hotel du Petit Moulin.  It is most certainly the trip of a lifetime – just as a honeymoon should be!

We have set up the registry through my wonderful friend at Flight Centre and I have started another wordpress blog to host our registry, wedding details, pictures and eventually the blog of our honeymoon as we show everyone what they helped contribute to!  Each experience will be documented within an inch of it’s life and posted on the blog with thanks to the guests that gave it to us as a gift.  It’s more work than I thought, but definitely worth it.

So glad to have these two ticked off my list.  Now I just need to send the invites out and the ball is ROLLING!

One more thing checked off with thanks to the very easy to deal with Chris from Corporate Chauffeured Cars (0438 340 166).

We don’t really see the point in spending up big on cars that barely anyone sees on the day, so we’ve gone for the top of the range Holden Caprice to ferry the bridal party around on the big day.  I personally think they look pretty hot!

Granted, my bridesmaid will be wearing a deep red colour, but the red carpets available are all a Christmas red, so it just wouldn’t do.

So I have been on a mission this week to find a 10 metre long white or ivory carpet.  Sounds much easier than it is, especially only 90 days out from a wedding in the peak of the “wedding season”.  It’s also going to cost me more than I have budgeted, but so far that is the only thing to go over budget, so I will just suck it up.

Booking the white carpet from the lovely Dalgarnos this week, so it can come off the list.

Under this tree is where I will be married in 94 days.  It’s a heritage listed Quercus Oak that is over 150 years old.  This picture was taken in Autumn (obviously) so in February it will be lush and green, and even more of a canopy than it already is with branches extending all the way to the ground.

The tree was planted in 1851 – the year that Victoria separated from New South Wales which is quite appropriate given I am originally Sydney-born and now firmly a Melbourne-gal marrying a Melbourne boy.

Well the beauty of having a cocktail reception is that we don’t need centrepieces on 15 tables.  And the beauty of designing your own dress is that you can do so such that an elaborate bouquet is not all that necessary.

So I was pretty excited when I saw these little tealight vases in this month’s Vogue – in the Christmas Gift Ideas section.  These are ideal for filling with some white blooms and placing on some of the low tables or side tables at the reception venue, and they double as tealight candle holders – just perfect.

A nice touch, good to look at and uber cheap.  Excellent.  I just ordered five of them.

Where to go when you want a wedding with a bit of a twist?  A reception that’s cocktail and therefore stand up, in intimate surroundings that are quintessentially “Melbourne”?

Welcome to Sixteen Ellis – a venue that we literally stumbled upon (it’s a little hole in the wall in a back street of South Yarra) and were stunned that it was available for our wedding day less than 5 months out from the date.

The ever fabulous Rebecca is our event manager and is just a delight to work with.  She certainly took all the pain and stress out of what could have been a reception in our own hire space, completely managed and coordinated by me.  Not fun, on your own wedding day!

The oppulent and somewhat dark surroundings may not instantly look synonymous with a wedding, but we just adore it for this very same reason.  Since I didn’t get my wish to elope, we’ve gone for quick and relatively informal ceremony followed by a great party.  Minimal formalities and maximum dancing and celebration.  There are plenty of ottomans and couches, along with some cute little booths for the oldies to rest their weary legs, never fear mum!

This pains me to say this, but the only shoes I could find that I liked, with a low heel, were from Alan Pinkus.

It pains me because the stuck up bitches in their High St store in Armadale were worthy of a punch in the face.  Normally I would go to great length to avoid handing over a large sum of money to a store that treats it’s customers with contempt, but after walking the streets of Melbourne for weeks now in search of “the shoe”, I am resigned to the fact that my Cinderella moment comes complete with the not-so-ugly yet still unsightly step-sisters taking my cash.

Grrrr.

At least I can cross this off my list.

I also may have mentioned before that I am slightly perfectionistic.  When I commit to doing something, I usually am not happy unless it’s the best I can possibly achieve.  I can hear my mother in my head right now… “If a job’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well!”

Thanks mum.  I agree!  So since I agreed not to elope and to stay in Melbourne and invite 150 of our friends and relatives to celebrate our marriage with ceremony, drinking, dance and speeches… I am completely committed to it being the best wedding, like, EVER.

Which in turn is causing me some stress.  See, to me it feels like I am the only one organising this wedding.  Adam is pretty disengaged from the whole process of organisation and only jumps in to stir the pot with his opinions, usually just moments before I am ready to book something or finalise a decision.  I have no idea what the best man is doing, I can’t imagine Adam has even asked him to do anything.  My poor darling mother is too far away to be hands on (and she is working 14+ hour days anyway, so I can’t imagine where she’d find the time!).  My mother-in-law, although she has oodles of time on her hands is so overtly opinionated and critical of the decisions we’ve already made about our wedding that I feel like it would simply be more stressful to get her involved, so she’s off limits too.  My bridesmaid seems to be doing about 5 people’s jobs in her workplace (the dangers of being perceived as too effective in your role!), and has had visitors staying with her the last couple of weekends, and is preparing for international and interstate Christmas visitors in her home as well… so suffice to say that she’s a bit preoccupied too!

So that leaves little ol’ me.  Oh and my travel agent, who is a friend and just the most wonderful and helpful person in my life at the moment!  If it wasn’t for her, I think I would be having a melt down right now trying to organise a wedding AND the honeymoon registry (which let me tell you, is much harder than a normal wedding registry).

The week before last I worked 80 hours in a week – it was a massive week with a pitch at the end of it and I barely saw my family let alone thought about the wedding!  Then last week Adam was interstate for the whole week, which just means I was back to single mother status temporarily – I had forgotten how exhausting it is!

Anyway, suffice to say that I am completely over this wedding and it hasn’t even happened yet.  Ah yes and to top it all off, I just got an email saying that the stuff I need for the ceremony (carpet runner, chair covers etc) is unavailable because our date is fully booked.  Joy.

I wish I had some extra hours in the day, or a second set of hands.

…—->>>> this one, is made of nipa leaves… (looks like coconut leaves… it is unique and cute isn’t it?- So I wonder maybe this is one of the choices . I might choose other variety of designs for the front face of the basket, maybe there are some more options ( I could put some flowers or butterflies) what do you think…?

One of this days I might to go the mall to see the materials needed… and might see other unique things for my BIG DAY!…

Hayz, I hope I can figure it out sooner so that by december we could start doing it at home…… For, those who have suggestions drop me an email thank U guys!!!

Truth be told, I wanted to elope.  I’ve been telling my mum since I was 15 to expect me to call her one day and say “oh yeah, by the way, I got married”… I have not really seen myself as the “wedding type” and at one point in my teen years I would’ve said I wasn’t even the “marriage type” either.

I think my desire to elope was primarily because it takes off all the pressure.  It makes the day, the event all about the couple and their commitment to one another – nothing else.

Adam and I are going pretty chillaxed on the wedding front… but even so, there is still pressure.  From venue selection, menu selection, deciding what time to start the ceremony, what time to start the reception, what music to walk down the aisle to, who should do readings, what should they read, what flowers should we have at the ceremony, bouquet or no bouquet, writing our own vows, who to invite, who to take off the list so we don’t go over the venue’s capacity, what to write on the invitation, what to do with my hair, what wedding band we want, aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!  So many bloody decisions.

It’s horrendous.  My idea of torture to agonise over every decision – because you see I am good at making quick decisions, sometimes rash decisions – but Adam is painfully slow to make up his mind about anything… It’s excrutiating.

But one of the decisions I am struggling with the most is what shoes do I buy?

Seems pretty simple right?  You won’t see them under my dress, how hard can finding an appropriate shoe be?  Well between my dressmaker telling me I simply must have a small heel because it dramatically changes the lines and shape of my body, to the stress of trying to find a shoe that seems to ‘work’ with the fabric swatches I have for my dress, to worrying about how comfortable will they be to stand in for 9+ hours?  Will I be able to dance in them?  Will they give me blisters and ruin my night?  Because the only thing worse that sore feet is a headache and if my shoes aren’t right I am destined to get both…

Decisions!  As if shoe shopping for women isn’t hard enough, this puts a whole new dimension on difficult.