This pic of Rihanna, snapped Saturday on the beach in Barbados, diggin’ out the “murf”! 

...I guess when you gotta, you gotta...

Ri-Ri was there to do a special New Year’s concert in Abu Dhabi.

Zobha's boyshorts are the next best thing to going commando

While many yogis go commando in class, I’m just not that kind of yogi. But it’s been a serious challenge to find the right item that lays undetectably flat under jersey practice pants, and that moves with you during a vigorous asana and, um, not up it.

However, I think the people at Zobha, a West Coast brand that’s slowly coming East, have solved this problem. (Thank you, Santa.) Their whisper thin seamless boyshort ($18) is far better than other “yoga panties” I’ve tried. They trump seamless laser-cut models whose fabric just can’t handle a workout and Lululemon’s boyshorts, which have seams that show. I also prefer them to Commando and Hanky Panky thongs. But that’s just me.

The Zobha boyshort goes where it needs to go and stays where it needs to stay (like a dutiful sartorial sentry), all while keeping the lowest possible (pantyline) profile. They have one seam, which runs along your, well, personal seam. But this does not show. It’s a nothing-there look, but with the security of a boyshort.

Lest you think I’m just gushing, the undies meet more objective standards of measurement, too, by delivering on all four sacred attributes of any fitness garment: moisture-wicking, breathability, quick dry, and shape retention. They’re not made from flax and bamboo. But they do have a wholesome cotton-lined gusset.

Plus, they’re cute. And although looking good is not my first priority in yoga class, it’s nice to feel confident and comfortable when bending, twisting, and squatting in ways that plumbers never would.

Available from www.zobha.com

Got another solution to visible yoga panty line or workout wedgies? Tell us, here!

Mop and bucket to ailse 3

Obviously, the lady doesn’t know that she’s standing in a crowded supermarket in just her underwear.  There is only one thing worse than a wedgie when your melons are being bagged – and that is having to queue up behind a senile, half-dressed, old woman at the checkout counter.

Photographed by Xhanatos

i had the 50-135mm mounted when this scene unfolded. only managed a quick snap before the guy in the back noticed me. he dragged his gf away as they both laughed hysterically..

wish I had a wider lens to capture entire scene

– License

Lady Gaga has been putting out top hit after top hit lately. When you turn on the radio you will undoubtly hear one of her songs. Okay so I like Lady Gaga music! Shoot me! I just like to dance! Her music is pretty good, but she has a … let’s just say eccentric fashion sense. But then again high fashion is kind of weird. Here are a  few pictures of the many outfits of the strange songstress.

It's the stage version of Watchmen!

Anyone up for Jewel Quest?

I don't know what's worse: the broken mirror or her massive wedgie!

Lady Gaga's day out. Why did they let her out?

I heard she was doing a duet with Mr. Bubbles.

Hope you enjoyed! No hard feelings Lady Gaga, just shits and giggles.

>Heather<

     I think it’s pretty safe to say that we’ve all had a wedgie at some point in time, right? They’re a total pain in the ass (sometimes literally), and they typically occur at very inopportune times.  This was one of the main reasons why I decided to make a full-time commitment to thongs a few years back.  Yes, you have to get used to having a permanent wedgie, but at least they’re staying in one place and not moving around every this way and that.  Or at least I thought they were….

     As I was walking into the gym yesterday, I had a most unpleasantly awkward experience in my nether regions.  Something was just not quite right.  Now, I don’t know if it was because I was wearing tight running pants or if it was because of the particular thong I had on, but I suddenly felt like I had a fredgie — a front wedgie. Whatever it was, I just knew that things had definitely shifted around down south.

     I went straight to the locker room to assess the situation.  My first thought was that maybe I had my damn thong on backwards.  After all, it HAS been a rough month in which I’ve been running on fumes, so it was definitely a possibility. After some top notch investigating, my suspicions were at once confirmed.  I didn’t have it on backwards, but I most certainly did have a fredgie goin’ on.  So, I put things back in their proper place and made my way to the weight room.  Problem solved.  However, as I was in the middle of my lunges, I again felt some creeping and crawling taking place in areas where they just should not be.  What the hell?!  Why was this happening to me?  

     I was then faced with how I should rectify this little predicament.  I thought maybe I could just do some extra wide squats to get things back where they should be, but that didn’t work.  I then tried doing some abdominal bicycle crunches to try to wiggle it out of there, but that didn’t work either.  I so badly wanted to just reach down and move it manually like guys do with their balls.  Why is it that men can grope and grab themselves in public and nobody even bats an eye? Women should be allowed this same opportunity.  Unfortunately, people tend to assume that women must have an STD or the freaking plague if they even so much as try to scratch that area.  So, I figured that option was out, as well.  Instead, I just sucked it up (no pun intended) and finished my workout with my vajayjay floss.  (Do you have any idea what that feels like on a stairmaster?!)

     This whole ordeal really got me thinking that there must be some other poor woman out there who’s shared this same experience.  So, I decided to ask my Twitter friends what they would call a front wedgie in a thong.  Surprisingly, I got a lot of really really funny responses. Some said camel toe (although it wasn’t something that could be seen externally), some said painful, and one even said torture.  My favorite response, though, was given by @Ieatmykidzsnack who said, “An orgasm.” Wow, I wish it was as good for me as it was for her.

My first job was in retail, and I vividly recall when thongs made their debut as everyday underwear.  A fuller-figured woman wanted to enter the dressing room so she could try on a pair (in the smallest size).  I, along with my colleague, quickly told her that it would be a health code violation and therefore wasn’t possible.  She appeared very disgruntled.

While on the phone with one of my best friends from high school, I told her that I didn’t understand what all the rage was about.  My friend then explained that thongs were a great invention as they eliminate the visibility of the panty line, and she found them to be extremely comfortable.

Puzzled but curious, I decided to invest in a pair.  To my amazement, I no longer had a traditional panty line.  Come to think of it, I never knew I had a panty line until I no longer had one.  But what I did see, however, was a thong line…coupled with the feeling of a semi-permanent wedgie.  Into the drawer they went.

Over the past 10-15 years, thongs have really come a long way.  From the g-string/T-back to low rise designs, it doesn’t surprise me anymore to know that other women swear by them.  But I’m just not one for wearing a thong on a regular basis.   Darn those Brazilians and their fio dental.

There has been a coup here in Gryphon’s Aerie

Gryphon is no longer administrator of The Gryphon’s Aerie.  I am.  My name is Cornelius Eugene Spots, Ph.D.  You may call me “Doc.”

Related posts include (in chronological order)

1. This Just In (the preliminary reports of a coup being planned), and

2. Film at 11 (shocking video of the coup itself)

It was not with a glad heart that Natasha and I planned and executed this hostile and semi-violent takeover.  With the exception of Gryph having difficulty breathing with Natasha sitting on his face, no one was seriously injured.  Natasha reported sustaining a non-life threatening wedgie.  I got a boo boo on my pinkie.

As new Chief Administrator I will clean up the boogla barieg nunimbia here in the Aerie.  Look for substantial policy and programming changes.

For starters there will be no more of this sappy “and we thank you for your support” sloop craditmia.  Much more to come.

In the meantime, please enjoy your visit to the Aerie. Browse around.  I personally recommend any and everything I’ve written.  If you use the bathroom while here, please be so kind as to leave 75 cents on top of the toilet tank.

Go ahead, now.  Look at something else here.  I’m finished for now.  Good Luck.

Chief Administrator

Cornelius Eugene Spots, Ph.D.

Doc, Chief Administrator

Natasha. Vice President in Charge of Vice

After the trash is hauled to the curb, the kids off to school and the boss in yet another board meeting, kick back for a few minutes of inner insanity and point your alter ego to one of The Go Nation’s 16 free communities. Show off your mullet, manboobs or your redneck ways. Why you can even check out the latest in muffintop fashion.

Check out The Go Nation will put the zing back in the most uneventful day. Log on to any of our sites and let your imagination run wild. Hey, there’s probably a few sites that you never even thought you’d be into before.

* Beer Belly Nation

* Beer Pong Nation

 * Fugly Nation

* Honeymoon Nation

* Hot Summer Nation

 * Sexcation Nation

* Man Boobs Nation

* Muffin Top Nation

* Mullet Nation

* Staycation Nation

* TailGating Nation

* Sneaker Nation

*The Red Neck Nation

* Sexy Athlete Nation

After the trash is hauled to the curb, the kids off to school and the boss in yet another board meeting, kick back for a few minutes of inner insanity and point your alter ego to one of  The Go Nation’s 16 free communities.

Show off your mullet, manboobs or your redneck ways. Why you can even check out the latest in muffintop fashion. Check out The Go Nation will put the zing back in the most uneventful day.

Log on to any of our sites and let your imagination run wild. Hey, there’s probably a few sites that you never even thought you’d be into before. 

* Beer Belly Nation

* Beer Pong Nation

* Fugly Nation

* Honeymoon Nation

* Hot Summer Nation

* Sexcation Nation

* Man Boobs Nation

* Muffin Top Nation

* Mullet Nation

* Staycation Nation

* TailGating Nation

* Sneaker Nation

* The Red Neck Nation

Check out More Wedgie Photos at Wedgie Nation

Wedgie Nation is now on Squidoo

After the trash is hauled to the curb, the kids off to school and the boss in yet another board meeting, kick back for a few minutes of inner insanity and point your alter ego to one of The Go Nation’s 16 free communities. Show off your mullet, manboobs or your redneck ways. Why you can even check out the latest in muffintop fashion. Check out The Go Nation will put the zing back in the most uneventful day. Log on to any of our sites and let your imagination run wild. Hey, there’s probably a few sites that you never even thought you’d be into before. * Beer Belly Nation * Beer Pong Nation * Fugly Nation * Honeymoon Nation * Hot Summer Nation * Sexcation Nation * Man Boobs Nation * Muffin Top Nation * Mullet Nation * Staycation Nation * TailGating Nation * Sneaker Nation * The Red Neck Nation * Sexy Athlete Nation

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Friends, I have become increasingly excited over the last 10 weeks, because I finally got something I always wanted.  My life was always a little bit incomplete, and a hole in my heart has now been filled with my greatest desire.  I now have: a butt.

I realize this isn’t the most exciting thing to most people, because many people have too much already, and would be willing to donate to the posteriorally-challenged people such as myself.  Having a rear has changed my life, my attitude, and especially my wardrobe.  I no longer have to wear suspenders under my shirt to keep my underwear from falling down!  I don’t have to buy belts from the children’s section any more to make sure I don’t lose my britches during long periods of walking, running, or riding a tricycle.  No longer will people say as I pass by, “There goes the guy with the Hannah Montana belt!  Let’s all mock him while pointing and throwing rotten fruit!”

Long gone is the day when I can only sit for 30 minutes at a time to keep my bony caboose from wearing through my jeans!  It’s like I’m sitting on a pillow filled with water placed on a 3-inch layer of feathers covered in rabbit pelts underneath a cloud.

Of course, every rose has it’s thorns, as I am increasingly subject to scientific phenomenon knows as “unassisted wedgies”.  This is where your rear reaches out and grabs a hold of your underwear (and God help me, my pants) like a horse eating an apple.  The only plus side is that when someone decides to give me a wedgie on purpose, I now have the protection to cushion the blow, where in the past, my pants would scrape directly against my tailbone.

I also have to be careful when I wear my swimsuit so my new-found booty doesn’t hang out too much.  But I guess that’s the nature of the beast when I wear a thong.  No way around it, that’s for sure.

The best part is, I no longer have to pad my underwear to acheive a “normal” look.  I’ll save a fortune on tissue paper.

SPECIAL BONUS MATERIAL FOR THE KYLE BAXTER PROJECT FAITHFUL

I love singing karaoke.  The video quality leaves something to be desired, but listen to that angel’s voice!  Hopefully I will get to post more of my karaoke soon.

I bought some new underwear for my daughter the other day. The package boasts, “Wedgie-Free!” This is a good thing. I’m not about to pay extra for a wedgie. It should be included in the price.

I’m the president of the Anti-PDA club.

You wanna express your love with your man? Fine, but keep it in the bedroom. No one needs to see you shoving your tongue down his throat (or your hand down his pants) when they’re going about their daily business.

And you know what else we don’t want to see? You shoving your hand down your own pants to adjust those boy shorts that keep creeping up your crack. Seriously, people, there are some things that should be left in the privacy of your own room/car/bathroom. Let’s make a deal, shall we? You keep the following disgusting habits to yourself and I get to keep my lunch down.

Deal?
Deal.

Loogies
Ew, ew and more ew.   As if the sound hawking up some phlegm isn’t bad enough, having to actually witness that slop drip from someone’s mouth is just plain disgusting.

Nail clipping
Sadly way too common, people think it’s okay to just clip their nails (and toenails!) in the office, the train, the bus, in class, etc.  But no, no, no. That is not, in any way, okay. Seriously, no one needs to see your clippings shoot across the room and they definitely don’t want to have to sit down on the remains. And, PS, filing those talons isn’t OK either. The sound of a file against nails? Shudder.

Using snot filled tissues to clean your snot filled nose
I get it; no matter how gross the sound of whatever is coming out of there, sometimes you just have to blow your nose. But that doesn’t mean that grabbing a dry, already-used something out of your pocket and then using it again (only to then stuff it back into your pocket) is okay!  Ok, so you’re trying to be green, but there are other people around. And we can see the leftovers. Smearing across your face. OMG, barf.

Picking…well anything.
I understand that sitting in lecture halls in college is actually painful, (well, painful is an understatement), but that does not mean that picking your face apart in order to pass the time is acceptable. Zits and scabs shouldn’t really be picked at in the first place, but if you must, do it in private. AND, keep your hands out of your ears. Picking ear wax is nothing short of nasty.  Q Tips were invented for a reason.

Adjusting down below
It could be itching, picking your wedgie, whatever.  No one really needs to see you do it.  Attempting to do it subtly is one thing, even though there is no way to play with your junk subtly, but going elbow deep to adjust that thong should be punishable by law. For real.

Public bathrooms may be gross, dirty, and definitely smelly, but they are the one place where it is acceptable (in a stall, please!) to do your nasty deeds.  Respect other people in public and keep your dirty self to your dirty self.

The front-wedgie mobile in action

That’s right folks.  Camel Towing is now offering free delivery on super tight stretchpants sizes 52″ and up! 

Not sold on Camel Towing?  Check out this testimonial from the now famous Moose Knuckler…

Dear Camel Towing,

I was recently on vacation and went to a taping for the Tyra Banks show.  When I unpacked my suitcase I realized that the only pants I had were the red stretchies I had on my person.   A) they smelled like wet dogs and yodels and B) They totally clashed with my gold, lavender, and pink sweater that I had picked especially for Tyra in hopes she might notice lil’ ol’ me. 

I called Camel Towing and within 30 minutes they came through with my patented “Oh my god” sized pink stretchies.  I looked so good they put me on TV!   Thank you Camel Towing!

Your Friend,

Giant Front-Crack McQuack

Sorry to get off base here…that was stupid, I realized it halfway through, but kept going. 

Anyway, Look at that FUPA.  Looks like she could poop out of it. 

Speaking of F.U.P.A’s…you all know what it stands for right?  In case my parents are reading, we’ll drop some knowledge on them.  F.U.P.A is a popular acronym for “Fat Upper Pussy Area.”  Other hot terms right now are Gunt, Bunt, and if you’re a guy, Gock.    I’m interested in other terms floating around for the “bulging southern belly”.  What do you guys got?

-CB

(thanks again Lu)

We spent Wednesday thrill seeking at Park City Mountain Resort.  The Alpine Slide was fantastic.  And although the ZipLine sounded thrilling, it was a bit disappointing.  Everyone agreed though that the Alpine Coaster was exhilarating!  We kept getting back in line to ride it over…and over… and over again.  If the ride wasn’t so great, I’d probably be bitter that the Coaster claimed my flower lens hood.   

My favorite part of the day though was when my middle guy turned to me and said, “Hey Mom!  I want to go on The Wedgie.”  “The what?!?  Which ride is that, sweetie?” “You know, The Wedgie.  The one that gives you a wedgie.” he responds as he points to the Legacy Launcher (which are basically trampolines on steroids that require jumpers to wear safety harnesses strapped around the legs and midsection that are attached to bungee ropes).  I couldn’t stop laughing.  How does he know what a wedgie is??  Is that even how you spell it?? 

I’m pretty sure they didn’t get wedgies, but it looks like they had a lot of fun!