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Stanly County BOE Redistricting Proposal Accepted Once Opposition Discovers Magnet Schools Are Not Actually Magnetic

From our Bureau of Academic Oversight Affairs, University of Albemarle, Albemarle, NC

An anomalous hush fell over the crowd at the Stanly County Commissioner meeting this past Monday night when members of the Magnetism Awareness Council Evincing Stagnation (M.A.C.E.S.), who have hammered their way into the hearts and minds of less-informed citizens by diametrically opposing any plan to elevate the plight of the schools of Stanly County, realized magnet schools have no actual relationship to physical magnetism. 632 more words

Justin Burr


“Looooook at meeeeeee.”

I tore myself away from page 136 of The Further Adventures of Brer Rabbit to look at her. She had her head thrown back, laughing out into the sky that would have been moving so fast in front of her eyes that the clouds would have seemed to be coming alive and running around like little white rabbits let loose in a barn full of hay. 711 more words


April Fool's Day means Free Music

Call us fools—a compliment, considering what people usually yell at us—but April Fool’s Day has us in the spirit of giving. It’s like fucking Christmas… 136 more words


Mark Twain Would Get It

The mailbox delivered an ominous warning from Sports Illustrated magazine today.

“Please contact us now if you don’t wish to receive the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue.” 464 more words


Flowers. Week 5

This week was all about the flowers. I had planned on visiting a florist in Lower East Side, but was prevented by the wind and cold. 435 more words

The Snake and The Frog

I enjoyed writing How The Fir Tree Came To Be so much that I decided to have another pop at a similar style, but this time it’s become more Aesop’s Fables than Rudyard Kipling. 273 more words


Fairy Tales

I created several drawings and paintings to accompany a fairy tale I am working on. These two, “Old Mother Goose,” and “Brer Rabbit/Tar Baby” will not be used. 155 more words

Art -- People