Tags » Detachment

My Dog Won't Fetch

“The scariest thing about distance is that you don’t know whether they’ll miss you or forget you.”
― Nicholas Sparks

In my last post I was speaking a bit about the notion of “emotional labor” and whether or not estrangement is “women’s work” – by which I refer to the business of “worrying” about relationships, naming and speaking “feelings” for self and for others, feeling “responsible” to solve and resolve emotional tensions and feeling or bearing a disproportionate amount of blame and shame for being unable to successfully manage these tasks. 398 more words

Fiona McColl

Surfing For Peace

“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”

― Jon Kabat-Zinn

It’s 1.30 a.m. and you find yourself jolted out of sleep. After you’ve allowed yourself to waken fully you become aware that you are thinking about the last conversation you had with your sister.

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Fiona McColl

Co-Dependency and Reaction

“You have the ability to choose your reactions.” 
― Steve Maraboli

One of the things about people who are codependent and who are estranged from their families is we tend to be pretty reactionary around our relationship “stuff” . 1,098 more words

Fiona McColl

Calling Our Energy Home

“I once had a garden filled with flowers that grew only on dark thoughts but they need constant attention & one day I decided I had better things to do. 448 more words

Fiona McColl

Why Letting Go Does Not Require Forgiveness

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. 598 more words

Fiona McColl

Choosing To Let Go

Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.

– Arthur Ashe

It’s a strange thing how so many of us stay tangled up in situations and relationships that leave us feeling depleted, sad, angry, powerless and convinced that we will be stuck there forever.   639 more words

Fiona McColl

Theme of the Week: Letting Go

“Let everything happen to youBeauty and terror. Just keep goingNo feeling is final” 
― Rainer Maria Rilke

Of all the lessons that family estrangement has taught me, the need and ability to “let go” is one of the most important and the one I have struggled with in many areas of my life, not only with my family. 287 more words

Fiona McColl