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Chief Keef Set To Release Chuck Schuldiner Hip Hop Tribute Record Titled “Trappin’ Da Corner”

Heavy metal artists and fans alike consider death frontman Chuck Schuldiner as the most significant force in the genre that came to be known as “Death Metal”. 483 more words

General Weirdness

PETITION - Free the Wolves in the Throne Room!

Nothing is crueler than keeping animals in captivity for human entertainment. Do your part today and help free these poor wolves that have been imprisoned in the throne room for 13 years now. 666 more words

General Weirdness

Norwegian Black Metal Linked To Abrupt Resignation of U.S. Secretary of Defense

Washington, D.C– Pentagon has released shocking new information surrounding Secretary of Defense, Chuck Hagel’s abrupt and unexpected resignation. Sources state that Hagel’s resignation was due, in part, to lack of support in his classified mission to negotiate alliances with various Norse metal icons in the fight against the expanding threat of Middle Eastern terrorist groups. 436 more words

General Weirdness

Varg Vikernes Suspended For 4 Games By NFL For Using Deflated Murder Weapons

The NFL has suspended Jacksonville Quislings quarterback Varg Vikernes for four games for deflating the footballs he used to beat nine French tourists to death last year. 477 more words

General Weirdness

Koch Brothers Purchase The Sun

Corporate Friends With Benefits

Koch Industries, America’s most influential and wealthy corporate person in history, has scored a major victory for the free market today by purchasing the Sun.   666 more words

General Weirdness

Helmut

It was no use. 
No matter what he tried, Helmut could not imagine happiness. 

He faked a smile – but in his heart he knew it was only a shadow – a grimace – a cheap forgery. 133 more words

Music

Government to Decommission Nikki Sixx; Plans To Build Nikki Sevenn

One of the military-industrial-entertainment complex’s most talented warriors has been targeted for termination. The lovable, alcohol and cocaine fueled robot-musician known as Nikki Sixx was created in 1981 by the Pentagon in order to help distract teenagers from engaging in issues that actually effect their lives and keep them focused on the fantastic illusion of limitless excess. 516 more words

General Weirdness