Tags » Hoofers

Percy Pibble, Canine Superstar!

After his sold-out appearance at the Meadowlands, Percy greets a herd of his adoring fans, who are udderly excited to meet him.

Via Mermaid Melissa.

Whatever Floats Your Goat

Friends, in farms everywhere, a silent tragedy unfolds: baby goats born with legs too short to reach the ground. For the innocents burdened with this mysterious affliction, life is an everyday struggle. 57 more words

Meanwhile, at the Lost and Found Desk at Alpha Centauri Intergalactic Spaceport...

“Um, excusing of me, but have any life forms located a small metal briefcase? Slate grey, black handle, glowing a little bit and making a humming noise, with tentacles? 17 more words

Meanwhile, at the Ernst Fleetman Institution for the Study of Uncontrollable Sprinting...

“SoBeckyandGailfromAccountingaskedaboutyoulastweekand (huff, puff) Itoldthemyouweredoingmuchbetterandthatyou’dprobablybe (huff, puff) outinaweekortwobutfranklyIdon’tseeanynoticablechangein (huff, puff) yourconditionAreyoutakingthosepillsthedoctorgaveyou? (huff, puff)”

Meanwhile, at Yuck-a-Bucks Comedy Club...

Hey it’s great to be here you’re a lovely audience but last night was a tough crowd lemmie tellya So many guys in camouflage I thought the place was empty I says I know you’re out there I can hear you reloading Don’t get me wrong I love my wife but I wish she’d stop hanging her pantyhose on my antlers am I right fellas But I can’t complain at least I get good TV reception… 28 more words

I Hope You Realize This Means War

For agonizing, eternal minutes, she and the interloper merely stared at one another, each afraid to move or speak. At last, the visitor found his courage, stepped forward, and offered the traditional greeting of his people: 34 more words

Larry Gets Buffaloed

“Are you gonna let that ram over there blow his own horn like he owns the place? Who does that conch-head think he is?”

“Yeah! I dare ya to challenge that petting-zoo inmate to a head-butting contest! That’ll show him!”