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Kong: Skull Island

Zinger of a lame sauce movie. Don’t get me wrong—it’s beautifully shot (mostly thanks to Australia), and the raw story is decent as far as monkey god stories go, but the characters are so flat that if you were to transform their depth into a puddle, an ant couldn’t drown in it. 188 more words

Movie Critiques

Oscars 2017: Wows & Whoopsies (Mostly Whoopsies)

Okay, so the two themes of the Red Carpet this year were MEH and BLEH. Tons of emerging trends that we just can’t be friends with: double waists, tiered skirts, twin handcuff bracelets, grievous throwbacks to horrible 90s belts…. 1,518 more words

Movie Critiques

Best movie of 2016: Hacksaw Ridge

Not the winner: La La Land
Runner-up: 13 Hours
Indie winner: The River Thief
Superhero winner: Captain America: Civil War
Significant unseens: Arrival, Beasts of No Nation, 1,601 more words
Movie Critiques

Rogue One: A Climax in Search of Footing

Here’s a very unthorough, non-geeky review of the new Star Wars spinoff.

I wasn’t interested in Rogue One (lame trailers had something to do with it; not being an addict of the Star Wars universe had something else) until I heard that it was basically World War II in space. 861 more words

Movie Critiques

Dr. Strange

I saw Dr. Strange last night and here are the thoughts that were going through my head on the drive home. I could say more, but I’ll just say this. 642 more words

Movie Critiques

N.D. Wilson's 'The River Thief'

Imagine Flannery O’Conner made a movie.

My gut reaction walking out of the theater: Shock. The River Thief was shockingly funny, shockingly scary, shockingly grim, shockingly merry, shockingly bold with both good and evil. 1,293 more words

Movie Critiques