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Want to help kids at St. Judes? Drink your broccoli soda

As I’m sure you can imagine, being a humor columnist, I am constantly working up a sweat. In fact, I can already feel perspiration forming. By the end of this paragraph, I will be a drippy, sweat-stained mess. 22 more words

Extra (Salty)

Do you enjoy crying? Are you into cutesy stuff? Do you enjoy crying at cutesy stuff? Do you enjoy gum commercials? Do you fall especially quickly for arguments rooted in Pathos? 276 more words



I often think about my time in Boston.

Perhaps it’s the collage of postcards I have up in my room depicting a Boston I didn’t see because it was buried under feet of snow. 65 more words



As I listen to songs on my playlist, the last thing I remember about them is I picked each of them out. I match up the feeling of the sound to the silent TV of movement that plays out on every screen ever known. 270 more words


Everybody's Uncle

I think all of us that have multiple uncles have that one uncle. You know the one I’m talking about. He’s the man who perhaps is a bit too focused on financial gain and/or perhaps he likes the tequila a little too much. 601 more words


Shhhh! Be verwy verwy quiet!

I’m going to be traveling a lot this month, and while I’m out of town our new CD, “Green”, is going to be released. I’m not supposed to post any sound files until November 1st… but by then I’m going to be somewhere that I don’t have internet or even mobile phone access. 92 more words