Tags » Schizoaffective

starting over

I purged this diary of all previously written words to regain the feelings of security and comfort.

To assure myself of this continued safety, I’m not venturing outside today.   209 more words


God's Little Hit-And-Run

You want an apology?

Fuck you and fuck your apology.

You want me to be sorry for the hell I put you though.

Sorry for the three A.M. 314 more words


That bullsh*t

So, I only worked 10 hours this week. It was still very hard to concentrate and have a clear mind. I don’t know what it is, but being on an mood stabilizing antipsychotic, my mind just feels weird. 52 more words

I'm Still In Recovery

Five years ago something happened to me which neither I nor anyone around me foresaw, I had my first psychotic break. Initially, in the months following my diagnosis of schizoaffective, I tried to gain control in a situation where I didn’t really have it. 515 more words

Fuck the job market

Okay I’m not really trying to get a job right now due to my condition but I thought it wouldn’t hurt looking around.

I thought I would look for unskilled part time work because something like that is low stress and requires not much concentration. 86 more words

Weight gain

Fuck. I’m gaining weight and there isn’t much I can do. Due to negative symptoms I have pretty hard avolition and lack of energy. Because of this and the fact I can’t focus, I can’t work out like I used to. 76 more words

Negative Symptoms - Avolition & Apathy

I have negative symptoms.

If you don’t know what negative symptoms are, it’s the lack of motivation, a lack of interest, and lack of pleasure, and a lack of focus. 264 more words