Tags » The Acorn

Simpson to Institute New “Trump Standards” for Plagiarism

SIMPSON – In an effort to stay on the leading edge of academic rigor, Simpson College will be implementing new plagiarism standards based on criteria set forth by Melania Trump on Monday for the 2016-2017 academic year. 317 more words

Simpson College

Simpson Announces First Successful Minnesotan-to-Iowan Conversion

SIMPSON – Scientists at Simpson College in Indianola announced today that after years of research and experimentation, they had finally succeeded in converting a Minnesotan into an Iowan. 325 more words

Simpson College

Simpson Will Build a Wall and Central Will Pay For It!

SIMPSON— The Dutch have struck again! Central students have been caught visiting Simpson College without proper documentation.

With Simpson being a private school, individuals must register to be on campus. 322 more words

Simpson College

Commencement Moved Indoors to Protect President Simmons' Mustache from Rain Damage

SIMPSON – Stormy weather predictions have caused campus administration to call for the implementation of “Plan Rain” with all Commencement activities to now take place indoors. 232 more words

Simpson College

Simpson Campus Deemed As National Wetland Park

HILLMAN— Yesterday’s death-bringing storm led to the recent massive flooding of campus.

Today, the Environmental Awareness Club (EAC) has proposed to convert the flooded campus into a protected national wetland park. 150 more words

Simpson College

The Acorn— 1st Print Edition

In our anti-green movement, we decided it was time to reach individuals through the legacy media of newspapers. To appease all audiences, here is our online version of this paper:

Simpson College

Lil' Dicky Draws Large Crowd Saturday Night in Successful End-of-Year Concert

SIMPSON — Rapper Lil Dicky did not disappoint his Simpson fans over the weekend.

Lil Dicky’s concert in the Black Box Theatre, which took place Saturday from 8-11pm, was met with resounding praise from Simpson students and members of the Indianola community. 188 more words

Simpson College