Tags » This Is 40

It's not even 5 AM...

I wake daily between 3 and 4 AM. Daily. It’s actually getting old.

The last two days my evenings were good. I felt strong and then early morning arrives and I miss “him”. 269 more words


My Best Friends Wedding

My best friend was married yesterday to a beautiful man.  I knew yesterday would be a hard day for me as my ex was invited and both our children. 505 more words


This is 40

I had so many mixed feelings about turning 40 last weekend.  I don’t really know what I expected to happen on the morning of May 15th.   430 more words


Knowing Doesn't Make it Better...

I wanted to know why. I wanted to know why he did what he did since November. Instead I found out something yesterday that made me so hurt all over again. 243 more words



Then sometimes I just break down in my car and feel paralyzed with fear. I know it will pass but when I’m in it the pain is so real and I feel like I’m breaking. 24 more words


When You Forget...

When you forget for a moment or two that you have coronary artery disease plus recently single with two kids after 19 years, a divorce but trying again since November and take a three mile walk, people watch, and enjoy some time out being alive in Santa Monica it’s a bit magical.   55 more words


It's the end of my 30s and I feel fine

I thought a lot about my life’s trajectory while lounging on a Florida beach, soaking in the sun on my 40th birthday last week. The thoughts weren’t too deep. 742 more words