Tags » Twats

BREAKING NEWS: Managing Director to withdraw staff bonuses again, just to be a prick

A piece of shit Managing Director isn’t going to pay out on bonuses promised to overworked staff just so he can be a complete bastard, it has been revealed. 401 more words


Just stop being a t**t

As I sat in my bedroom on Saturday night, the only room in which I can just about drown out the insidious din from next door, I was contemplating the many ways to murder the inconsiderate son of our neighbour. 423 more words

Washing Up Bowls

Do you know what really grates my carrot?

Washing up bowls! When I moved to the UK it was the first time I was introduced to the idea of using a washing up bowl in the sink. 394 more words

Gaze (a definition)

Somewhere recently I encountered the notion that the word gaze means to stare at something intently. If this is your definition of the word please take this advice, take the saddle off your bicycle, place something sharp and rusty in its place and enter the Tour de France at the first opportunity. 243 more words


the boat race


the boat race ( a little truth )

you'll never see me cheering on the boat race

life's just too short - me thinks

to pander to this dull, elitist scroat-ache

i hope that oxbridge sink



Still Last Valentine's Day

Away from the cacophony of the downtown hustle and bustle, Taylor pressed into his last pose. He exhaled slowly and returned to child’s pose. He listened to the rhythmic, soothing forest noises over the sound system. 829 more words